Super Benson

Section 1: The Free Loader

“KAMEHAMEHA!”
“Ahhh! It’s too big! I can’t take it!”
“Come on, Kefla! Take it all!”

After taking the full force of the Kamehameha, Kefla let out a long, feminine, breathless moan.

“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…!”

The computer speakers were blasting at full volume, making the entire bedroom seem to shake.

“Yeah! That’s my boy, Goku!” a skinny, middle-aged geek shouted, jumping up from his chair.

His name was Benson.

Benson was thirty years old, stood only 165 centimeters tall, and had a distinctive watermelon-shaped hairstyle. He was single, unemployed, and still completely dependent on his mother, who gave him five dollars in allowance every day. He spent most of his days wearing pajamas, even when going outside.

Suddenly, the video froze, and a loading spinner appeared in the middle of the screen. Benson waited for a full minute before checking his internet connection, only to find that it was disconnected.

“Mom! What happened to the internet?! Did you unplug the cable again while sweeping the floor?!”

His mother walked over to his bedroom doorway.

“Oh, I forgot to pay the internet bill. And get your ass out of that room! Stop watching porn all day and go find a job!”

“Yeah, yeah…” Benson muttered.

With no internet at home, he grabbed his phone and the five dollars his mother had given him that morning, then headed straight to a nearby café called Coffee Monster, where he could use the free Wi-Fi.

Section 2: Double Standard

When Benson entered Coffee Monster, a few customers were already waiting in line. He joined the queue behind a tall, muscular young man with a handsome face.

When it was the young man’s turn, he stepped up to the counter.

“One small sandwich, please.”

The waitress handed him a sandwich with a sweet smile.

“Three dollars.”

The man paid, then noticed a sign on the wall.

MINIMUM PURCHASE — $5

“Hey, doesn’t that say there’s a five-dollar minimum?”

Before the waitress could answer, he gave her a wink.

Her cheeks immediately turned red, and a playful smile spread across her face.

“For someone as handsome as you? I think I can let it slide, just for you.”

The man grinned. He pulled out a small business card with his name and phone number on it and slid it across the counter.

“Call me maybe. We can get a hotel room somewhere tonight or something.”

The waitress blushed even harder. She quickly picked up the card with both hands and pressed it against her chest.

“I will!”

The man picked up his sandwich and casually walked toward the seating area.

Benson stood behind him, completely stunned.

What the fuck? Is it that easy?

He stepped up to the counter. The waitress slipped the card into her pocket, took a deep breath, and returned to her professional smile.

“What can I get you, sir?”

Benson studied the menu, looking for the cheapest thing available.

“Water, please.”

The waitress nodded.

“Anything else?”

“Nope. Just water.”

She stared at him for a moment.

“The water is free, but the cup costs one dollar.”

“That’s fine.”

Benson handed her a dollar, took his cup of water, and started walking toward the seating area.

“Excuse me, sir!”

He stopped and turned around.

The waitress pointed at the sign on the wall.

MINIMUM PURCHASE — $5

“You need to spend at least five dollars if you want to sit here and use our Wi-Fi.”

Benson glanced at the handsome man, who was already sitting comfortably at a table, enjoying his three-dollar sandwich.

“Um… but that guy only spent three dollars.”

The waitress completely ignored his point, her expression turning serious.

“The rule applies to everyone, sir.”

“Oh…”

Benson reluctantly returned to the counter. He looked at the menu again, then counted the money in his hand.

Four dollars.

Everything else on the menu was either too expensive or would leave him without enough money.

Then he remembered what the handsome man had done.

All right. Here goes nothing.

Benson straightened his back, leaned slightly toward the waitress, and gazed deeply into her eyes.

Then, with all the charm he could muster, he gave her a wink.

The waitress immediately recoiled in horror.

“AHHH! GET AWAY FROM ME, YOU CREEP!”

The manager rushed over.

“What’s going on?!”

“This creep is sexually harassing me!” the waitress screamed, pointing at Benson.

The manager grabbed Benson by the collar and lifted him off his feet.

“Sexual harassment is a felony, you sick bastard! I could call the cops right now, or I could smash that watermelon head of yours myself!”

“AHHH! N-No! Please! Don’t beat me! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”

The manager glared at him before dropping him back onto his feet.

“Then spend five dollars or get the hell out!”

“Y-Yes, sir!”

Benson quickly turned back to the menu. After staring at it for a few seconds, he slowly raised four fingers.

“Um… can I buy four more waters?”

The waitress exchanged a confused look with the manager before reluctantly taking his remaining four dollars.

A minute later, Benson was carrying a tray with five cups of water toward the seating area.

He found an empty table, carefully placed all five cups in a neat row, and sat down.

Five dollars. Five waters. Free Wi-Fi.

Section 3: All Alone

A woman walked into Coffee Monster with her young son. As they passed Benson’s table, the boy suddenly pointed at him.

“Mommy, why does that old guy have five cups of water all to himself?”

His mother quickly pulled him closer.

“Don’t make eye contact with him. He’s a creep. A complete loser.”

She hurried her son away.

At the table, Benson had already finished two of his five cups of water. He was staring at his phone with a bored expression.

“Ugh, playing video games is boring.”

He closed the game and opened his favorite pornographic website instead.

Benson put on a pair of Bluetooth earbuds, but forgot to turn them on.

Loud moaning sounds immediately began playing through his phone speakers.

Several customers nearby turned to stare at him in disgust. Benson noticed none of it and continued browsing as if everything were perfectly normal.

About an hour later, Benson finally put down his phone and looked around the café.

Almost every table around him was occupied by a couple, holding hands, leaning close to each other, and acting all lovey-dovey.

Benson looked back at his own table. Five empty cups sat in front of him, with nobody sitting across from him.

A terrible feeling of loneliness washed over him.

Just as his mood hit rock bottom, he noticed two men sitting together at a table in the corner.

Benson stared at them for a moment.

Finally. At least I’m not the only loser here who can’t get a girlfriend.

He leaned back in his chair, feeling slightly better.

Then the two men kissed.

Benson froze.

What the fuck?!

Before he could recover, the two men wrapped their arms around each other and began French kissing, their tongues twisting together like two snakes locked in a wrestling match.

Benson stared in disbelief.

Even they’re a couple?! Damn you! Damn you homosexuals!

He slowly turned back toward the empty chair across from him.

I guess I’ll be all alone for eternity.

Section 4: Peeping Tom

Benson sighed and picked up his phone again. Resting both arms on the table, he held the phone almost level with his eyes and casually scrolled through the screen.

Through a small gap beside his phone, something at the table directly ahead caught his attention.

It was the handsome man from earlier, sitting with his girlfriend. One of the middle buttons on her blouse had been left undone, and she wasn’t wearing a bra.

Benson’s attention immediately shifted away from his phone.

But this time, he knew better.

He kept his phone raised, secretly peeking through the gap beside it. From his angle, he could see through the opening in her blouse, but the shifting fabric kept blocking his view.

Benson subtly adjusted his head.

Come on…

As the woman shifted in her seat, he leaned slightly to one side, trying to get a better angle.

Just a little bit more…

Benson was convinced he was being extremely discreet. Nobody would ever notice.

Then the woman shifted again, and the opening in her blouse widened.

Benson held his breath.

Almost there…

Her nipple was just about to come into full view. Suddenly, someone stepped directly into his line of sight.

Benson frowned and lowered his phone. His expression froze.

Standing directly in front of him was the same tall, muscular, handsome man from earlier.

The man grabbed Benson by the collar and lifted him out of his chair.

“You fucking creep! You think I didn’t see you staring at my girlfriend?!”

“Ahhh! N-No! I’m sorry! Please! Don’t hurt me!”

The man dragged Benson across the café by the collar, while Benson stumbled helplessly beneath his grip. Customers turned to watch as he dragged him to the entrance and threw him out onto the sidewalk.

Benson hit the ground and scrambled backward.

The man stood in the doorway.

“I’m being merciful this time. But there won’t be a next time. If I ever see you in this café again, I’m gonna beat the crap out of you.”

Benson nodded frantically.

“Yes… yes… I understand…”

He scrambled to his feet and ran.

Benson ran until the café was out of sight. A short distance away, he reached a flower shop and crouched beside the entrance, gasping for breath.

He stayed there for a while, trying to catch his breath, but the more he thought about what had happened, the angrier he became. Everyone looked down on him. Everyone treated him like a loser.

He clenched his fists, unable to take it anymore.

Section 5: Super Benson

Slowly, Benson stood up.

“I’ve kept my secret for so long… I know I shouldn’t do this… but you’ve left me no choice.”

He clenched both fists, raised his head toward the sky, and let out a thunderous roar.

“WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!”

The ground beneath his feet began to tremble as a blazing golden aura erupted around his body.

His skinny frame rapidly grew taller and more muscular, rising from 165 to 178 centimeters. His watermelon-shaped hair shot upward, transforming into sharp golden spikes.

SUPER BENSON HAS ARRIVED.

Super Benson walked over to the flower shop, plucked a red rose from a bucket near the entrance, and placed it horizontally between his teeth.

The female owner immediately rushed outside.

“Hey! You didn’t pay for that!”

Super Benson turned his head toward her and gave her a wink.

The woman’s cheeks immediately turned red.

“Oh… for someone as handsome as you? Forget it. You can have it.”

Super Benson grinned. He pulled out a small business card with his name and phone number on it and flicked it toward her, landing it perfectly between her fingers.

“Call me maybe. We can get a hotel room somewhere tonight or something.”

The woman clutched the card tightly against her chest, blushing even harder.

“I’ll be waiting!”

With the rose still between his teeth, Super Benson raised two fingers and pressed them against his forehead.

INSTANT TELEPORTATION!

A golden flash burst around him.

He vanished.

Section 6: Super Benson vs. The Handsome Guy

Super Benson appeared out of nowhere inside Coffee Monster, standing right beside the handsome man’s table.

The man looked up, startled.

“WHAT THE—?!”

He jerked backward so violently that his chair tipped over, sending him crashing to the floor.

Super Benson stood over him, the rose still between his teeth and a confident smile on his face.

“Well, well, you two-timing bastard! You’ve got such a gorgeous girlfriend sitting right here, and yet you were asking that waitress to go to a hotel with you just a little while ago!”

He leaned closer.

“I’ll teach you a lesson! I’ll beat you up and fuck you good!”

The handsome man trembled in terror. A dark stain spread across the front of his pants as he wet himself.

Super Benson burst out laughing.

“HAHAHA! Look at you! A grown man pissing his pants in public!”

He turned toward the other customers and shouted.

“HEY, EVERYONE! LOOK OVER HERE! THIS GUY JUST PISSED HIMSELF!”

With one hand, Super Benson grabbed the man’s pants and ripped them apart, tearing his underwear along with them. A pool of urine spread across the floor beneath him.

Some customers burst out laughing, while others covered their mouths, trying to hide their smiles.

The man’s girlfriend marched over and slapped him hard across the face.

SMACK!

“Ew! You’re not even a man! Look at you! You pissed yourself!”

Super Benson casually gave the man a kick, sending him skidding across the café floor.

CRASH!

He smashed straight through the glass entrance door and landed sprawled on the sidewalk outside.

Super Benson then took the rose from between his teeth and turned toward the woman, gently offering it to her.

“A man like this doesn’t deserve you. Today, I’ve shown you the monster hiding behind that handsome face.”

The woman’s cheeks slowly turned red.

Super Benson flashed her a dashingly handsome smile.

“Don’t worry. I’ll take you away from here.”

Before she could respond, he swept her into his arms.

The woman gasped and instinctively wrapped her arms around his neck.

Super Benson bent his knees.

BOOM!

He launched himself through the shattered café entrance and shot into the sky, carrying her in his arms.

Buildings flashed beneath them as they soared over Flushing City.

Within moments, a massive luxury hotel appeared ahead.

Super Benson flew straight toward the hotel.

CRASH!

He smashed through a window and landed inside a luxurious hotel suite, sending shattered glass flying across the room.

Still holding the woman in his arms, he walked over to the bed and gently laid her down.

The two embraced and shared a passionate kiss.

Super Benson gazed into her eyes.

“May I?”

The woman smiled shyly.

“I’m all yours. You saved me, Mr. Super Saiyan.”

She slowly raised one hand to her blouse and began unbuttoning it, revealing more and more as the fabric parted.

Super Benson held his breath.

Almost there…

Her nipple was just about to come into full view.

Section 7: Fly Swatter

SMACK!

Benson let out an ear-piercing, high-pitched, girlish scream.

“Aarrrrhhhhhhhhhhh…!”

The luxury hotel vanished. The beautiful woman vanished. The golden hair, the muscles, the blazing aura—everything was gone.

Benson was still crouching beside the entrance of the flower shop in his pajamas, with a disgusting, horny grin stretched across his face.

Standing over him was the female shop owner, holding a fly swatter in her hand.

“You fucking asshole! How long are you going to squat in front of my store with that disgusting grin on your face?!”

Benson blinked in confusion.

“H-Huh?”

“You fucking pervert! You’re blocking my entrance and scaring away my customers! Get the hell out of here before I call the cops!”

“Ahhh! S-Sorry! Sorry!”

Benson scrambled to his feet and scurried away like a dog with its tail between its legs, covering his swollen cheek.

There was no Super Benson, and there had never been one. It was all just a ridiculous daydream.

In the end, Benson never got to see that long-awaited nipple. Not in real life. Not even in his own fantasy.